Baby Jesus

This morning Rachel very sleepily climbed out of bed, kind of swayed for a minute trying to get her balance, and mumbled "I'm tired" on her way into the bathroom. I wish I knew if she goes right to sleep or wakes up in the night. She got dressed relatively quickly and on her own, but had a little trouble with getting stuck in what I call her OCD loop mode. Sometimes when she's getting dressed she'll adjust a piece of clothing, and then adjust it again, and again, and again.... The problem is that the more you pull something on or up (like underwear or socks) the more uncomfortable they become and the need to adjust them increases. I sometimes have to stop her and fix whatever it is that she's "adjusting" because she can't figure out how. If it gets too bad she'll just take it completely off again and throw it or rip it. She will sometimes do the same kind of thing with her dirty clothes or pajamas she's taken off. She'll put them down, decide they're not in the right place, and just keep moving them an inch or two. Usually the amount that she moves them is pretty minuscule, but she'll keep moving them just a tiny bit until something distracts her. Usually it's just when she's getting dressed, though. She was relatively happy this morning (she didn't say anything inappropriate to anyone, at least).

Yesterday at Church I had the opportunity of talking a little about Rachel and her feelings about Christmas. At first it was really hard for me to come up with anything positive to say, because she's been so negative lately. I really struggled to find something to share, but then I remembered how she used to call the nativity the "Baby Jesus." In her sweet, childlike way, she understood that that was the important piece. Without that piece, it's just a bunch of people and animals. From the time she was very small, she could look at a picture she'd never seen before and, out of a group of bearded and robed men, point to the picture of Jesus. She knows Him. She always has. And He is there for her. There have been so many times when I needed to explain something to her that was totally incomprehensible, and found I didn't need to. She was fine. When I literally can't do for her what she needs, He comforts and helps her. And then He comforts and helps me.

We ended our day by visiting friends who have an amazing nativity scene. It takes up a whole room, and it's the entire city of Bethlehem. We go each year and look at each of the figures and the animals and the houses. It's truly amazing. Rachel didn't say much, but she really enjoyed looking at all the details. She was smiling a little bit when I put her to bed. I love this time of year.